Different Roads, Same Destination
by Lady Addiction
Summary: As a child, Hikaru was diagnosed with a rare, degenerative condition known as MS. What impact would this have in Hikaru and his family? Where does Akira, Akari, and Waya come in? AU, GEN, WIP
1. Chapter 1

Title: **DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION**  
_Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Characters, Main: Hikaru, Sai, Akira, Akari, Mitani  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities_

_DISCLAIMER: Hikaru no Go doesn't belong to me._

_SUMMARY: In another universe, Hikaru is diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis._

_**DEDICATION: **Thanks so very much to **Harumi **for being such a friend, helping me go over my ideas and also beta-ing my fic thoroughly! hugs And thanks also to the **Lord**, for giving me the time and the inspiration to write this fic._

_Thanks for the people who have left me reviews in my fics (any of them)! I never mention how much it thrills me to read them and how much reviews have encouraged me to keep writing! Thanks so very much!_

_I was hoping to finish this before posting it, but it looks like there'll be several more chapters and with classes and all, I decided to start posting a part weekly. So **BE WARNED**, it'll probably have all sorts of errors and what-not._

_**REVISED: Sept 14, 2005**  
_

**_NOTES:_**

_1. While I have researched MS and its effects on people, I do realize that there's probably a number of inaccuracies here. Please pardon the errors and feel free to correct them._

_2. Akenoyama is not an actual district, but I created it as a district in Tokyo for the convenience of the story._

_3. I've blanked out on the names of Hikaru's family members. If anyone knows for sure, please comment & let me know! It'll be much, much appreciated!_

WWWW

**I.**

Tragedies always seem to come upon people's lives like a lightning bolt hitting a tree. All the aftermath left would be charred and broken remains.

This was how Shindou Mitsuko felt when she learned of her son's condition.

It all seemed so unfair that her bright, handsome boy could have such a condition. Hikaru was the healthiest baby, round and plump. He had been noisy and greedy, but their family doctor had marvelled at how excellently he grew and developed. The chubby toddler had grown into a boisterous, energetic child who delighted in athletic events and despaired at scholarly duties. Mitsuko often commiserated with other mothers in the neighbourhood who had shared the same fate, but for all that she scolded Hikaru for his low marks, she was delighted to have such a son born from her flesh.

Then Hikaru started having problems.

At first, they had passed it off as things that just happened to people. After all, cramps in the middle of the night were common during winter, why shouldn't it also happen in the spring or summer?

However, Hikaru started to report other problems. Mitsuko listened with growing alarm as he told her stories of how he would stumble when he walked because his toes suddenly felt numb, or how the night cramps became painful spasms, or how he was starting to get dizzy at heights.

Frightened, Mitsuko had immediately taken her only child to the Emergency Room at their family hospital. The emergency doctor examined Hikaru but couldn't find any obvious problems – the boy had then been recommended to see a specialist.

It was a private specialist clinic and Masao had refused, stating that his company's medical coverage didn't include such clinics and that the costs were unreasonable. Mitsuko had reluctantly agreed and had immediately taken Hikaru to one of the local apothecaries for herbal medicines and teas that could possibly cure her son's problem.

She had forced the awful-smelling potions upon Hikaru for weeks and the problems seemed to go away. Her ten-year-old was once again happy and healthy, enjoying his entrance into his school's soccer team.

Mitsuko had breathed a sigh of relief. Hikaru was going to be fine.

Unfortunately, her prediction was wrong. Four months after their visit to the apothecary, she and her husband awoke near dawn to the sound of Hikaru screaming and sobbing. Upon rushing to their son's bedroom, they learned to their horror that Hikaru could not feel or move his legs. Wrapped in her husband's arms, Mitsuko rode on the ambulance with a sedated Hikaru, a numbing horror spreading from her heart to the rest of her body.

Mitsuko had thought that the hospital would cure her son. She was wrong.

For although there was something obviously wrong with Hikaru, the doctors couldn't pinpoint the reason why. He didn't have a spinal cord injury, X-rays were showing no problems, and examination of his legs revealed no issues with either bone or tissue.

Two months of consecutive tests passed with no obvious conclusion. Mitsuko, to her later embarrasment, had finally exploded in rage against Higurashi-sensei, Hikaru's doctor, half-way through this endless, nightmarish procession. For weeks, she and her father were subjected to vague, wishy-washy discussions about her son's illness, with Higurashi-sensei downplaying the severity of Hikaru's condition and handing them empty platitudes that the hospital was doing its best and that her son would be fine. Higurashi-sensei had been affronted by her conduct and had recommended that care of her son pass onto another of his colleagues.

It was Yamaoka-sensei, a new graduate at one of the most prestigious medical colleges in Japan, who recommended a Magnetic Resonance Imaging scan done on Hikaru, followed promptly by a spinal tap procedure. When the results came out, Yamaoka-sensei had calmly sat Mitsuko, her husband, and her parents down in a conference room and clearly explained what her son was suffering from.

Multiple Sclerosis.

A disease with many forms. An inflammatory disease of the nervous system that left patches of damage which interfered with the regular functioning of the body. Since the damage can appear anywhere, the symptoms varied, from paralysis to numbness of various limbs to depression to visual impairment and many others.

Yamaoka-sensei told them that MS may be life-changing, but it did not mean that the quality of life can deteriorate. Hikaru would have periods where there would be no symptoms and, he assured them, if they took care that he ate healthily and exercised well, these periods can last for months and years.

A sense of deep relief had flooded Mitsuko at this pronunciation. Then her husband spoke: "You mean, this disease cannot be cured? Hikaru is terminally ill?"

Yamaoka-sensei hesitated. "MS patients can live long lives. However," he looked each one of them in the eye, "MS is a deteriorating disease. As Hikaru grows older, you may find that the periods of relapse, when he suffers symptoms, stretch longer and that his symptoms are much more pronounced. So, in a sense, yes, Hikaru is terminally ill."

Mitsuko bowed her head and cried.

WWWWW

Three days later, she convinced her father to talk to Hikaru about his illness. During the month that the boy had been in the hospital, Hikaru had gone from panic to curious enjoyment to depression. Weeks of running around the hospital in a wheelchair had lost its glamour as time passed and Hikaru watched other patients come and go.

She had sat with her father as he explained the nature of Hikaru's disease to her son. Hikaru had listened solemnly, his bright green eyes wide. She couldn't prevent her trembling as she watched the light in that gaze dim. Hikaru had smiled and assured them that everything was going to be fine.

Later that night, they were awoken by an urgent call from the hospital. Hikaru had somehow gotten a hold of razors and had slit his wrists.

The vigil held for those long hours seemed to last forever. When Yamaoka-sensei came out of the operating room and told them that Hikaru was going to be live, Mitsuko and her mother grabbed the doctor's hands and kissed them in heartfelt gratitude.

But Hikaru was far from well. After his failed suicide attempt, Hikaru went into a rapid decline. He refused to talk to anybody, he didn't respond to any of his visitors, and he didn't eat or drink. She watched him in his special room, where the nurses kept a close watch on him and ensured that he made no further attempts.

Mitsuko had to watch her husband turn away from their son. Masao had began to spend much more time at work. She pleaded for him to visit the hospital but he refused. As the days turned into weeks and months, Masao acted as if Hikaru no longer existed. Mitsuko hated him for that. She began to hate herself as well for her helplessness and her inability to help her son.

Visiting Hikaru's room became a personal nightmare for her. To see her precious son lying there, so pale and thin, all manners of tubes running through his body, strapped down carefully so he didn't try and hurt himself. She forced herself to sit beside him, chatting to him as if he was a friend on the phone. Her trips away from his bedside grew longer and longer.

Sometimes Mitsuko wondered if it wouldn't have been better if Hikaru had succeeded in his attempt. And she hated herself for thinking that.

It was her father who became Hikaru's saviour. Her father, who doted on his only grandchild, never stopped visiting. Daily he was there at Hikaru's bedside, reading newspaper articles to him and talking to the boy as if there was nothing wrong.

It was her father, not her, who eventually pulled her son out of the abyss. Not her, the woman who had given birth to him, who had fed and clothed him for ten long years.

Mitsuko wondered what would happen to her family now.

-End Chapter-


	2. Chapter 2

**DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION**

By Lady Addiction

_Thanks to all the reviewers who commented and thanks especially to **suvius (aka melar)** who was so informative and helpful regarding MS. As always, I couldn't have written this without the help and support of **harumi**, who patiently helps me with ideas and all my angsts regarding this story, and the **Lord**, who constantly gives me time and energy and inspiration._

_Please check **www . livejournal . com / community / inkyplumes / 3398 . html **for replies to your reviews! I'll be updating that post as I go along._

_NOTE: This is a **GEN fic**! There will be **NO PAIRINGS**, het or yaoi, in this fic at all! Please do not ask for pairings because such requests are not appreciated._

WWWW

**II. **

Ishida Hiroshi was a man well-known for his great heart and his ability to deal with problems as they come. He was also hardworking and patient, which was how he managed to make an antique shop boom. It had nearly broken his heart when he was forced to pass it onto a distant cousin because Mitsuko, his only child, was not interested in antiques and her husband, Masao, was determined to make it in the corporate world.

Hiroshi hid it well, but he didn't like Masao. Hiroshi, who had grown up in rural Hokkaido before he had moved with his wife and two-year-old daughter to Tokyo, couldn't understand why so many young people felt the need to work for big firms which forced them to commute long distances and stay long hours. When he visited his daughter, he hated hearing about how Masao had returned home late yet again or how he seemed to spend so little time with his wife and child. Hiroshi even suspected that Masao was unfaithful to Mitsuko but since his daughter was happy and content, he said nothing and only shared his anger and dislike with his own loving wife, Yumi. Yumi often counselled him to trust in Masao and Mitsuko and to let them live their own lives, mistakes and all. He chafed under this advice but followed it nonetheless.

However, in the aftermath of Hikaru's diagnosis, Hiroshi disliked Masao even more intensely. Ever since Masao had learned that his son had a lifelong deteriorating condition, he acted as if the rest of Hikaru's life was already beyond salvation. Even the child's attempted suicide hadn't shaken off the man's apathy. Instead, to Hiroshi's disgust, he only heard Masao lecturing Mitsuko on how Hikaru didn't need to be coddled by letting his sulking go on, that specialists or physiotherapy were too expensive and unnecessary for a patient who had a terminal illness anyway.

It was only Yumi's tight clasp on his hands that kept him from starting a fight with his son-in-law after hearing that ridiculous reasoning. Masao had even said it with Hikaru's door open, uncaring what his son might think upon hearing words like that. Hiroshi had ordered Masao to leave and to never come back. The younger man had flushed angrily and strode off, telling his wife that he would see her at home. Mitsuko had followed after her husband, a distraught expression on her face. Hiroshi had gathered his wife in his arms and led her to their grandson's bedside.

Maybe to Masao, the boy had become worthless trash. To Hiroshi, however, Hikaru was still a most precious person and he was determined to prove it to the boy.

Every day, he would come at the start of visiting hours and spend all day with Hikaru, who after some time in the isolated ward had been returned back to the children's wards. He read articles and novels aloud, at first in a soft, embarrassed tone. As time passed, Hikaru's favourite weekly manga became his favourites as well, and Hiroshi began to enjoy dramatizing his daily readings. He had even gathered a small audience of child-patients who would listen to him with excitement. His grandson would remain inert, though his dull eyes would flicker to Hiroshi's face and away from time to time.

He also began to badger the doctors and nurses to allow him to take Hikaru outside. Carefully, muscular interns would move the boy's limp body from the bed to the wheelchair and Hiroshi would push his grandson around the hospital grounds. His favourite spot was by the beautiful ginkgo tree next to a koi pond. There he would compose haiku for Hikaru to listen to or they would turn on the radio. A normally shy and reserved man, Hiroshi found he didn't mind people staring as he danced to pop music or belted out Enka songs out of tune. Through all this, he would often find Hikaru watching him, though the boy didn't say a word. Constant exposure to the sun had given a healthier flush to the boy's skin, and Hiroshi was gratified when Yamaoka-sensei praised him for his diligent and loving care.

Seven weeks after Hikaru's suicide attempt, Hiroshi decided to look into his shed. This was where he kept all the family heirlooms or the special antiques people gave him. He had a vague idea of bringing his grandson something from the shed, remembering how the boy and his friend Akari-chan delighted in hunting for 'treasures' in that dusty storage building.

There he saw the mysterious goban that had sat there untouched for years.

A friend had passed it onto him when he was still running the antique store and had warned him about a rumour that a ghost possessed it. Hiroshi had kept the goban aside, a little wary of the tale. There were many ghost stories attached to the antiques that had come his way, but he had never felt the same chill with them as he did with this particular antique.

Now, he knelt down before it and brushed away the accumulated dirt and dust. Absentmindedly, he ran his hands gently all around the edges.

Two years ago, he had tried to entice eight-year-old Hikaru into playing this one game that Hiroshi loved. However, his grandson took one glance at the plain-looking board and its two sets of stones and persuaded his Jii-chan to take him to go to the zoo instead. For one reason or another, Hiroshi was never able to teach Hikaru the game.

If the doctor was right, his grandson was going to have long, difficult life. Though there were MS patients who rarely used wheelchairs even after years of living with the disease, Yamaoka-sensei had said that there might come a time when the boy may need to use such a device for long periods of time. Hiroshi was well-aware of how expensive medical treatments were if a family needed to pay for it privately, and he knew from an old friend who had lost his leg in the Second World War how hard it was to live a life as a disabled man in a society that looked down upon such unfortunates. Hiroshi was afraid that Hikaru may have an even harder time finding work if it was found out that he had a lifetime condition and one that sounded so mysterious and strange. Ignorant people may think MS was contagious and cause even more problems for his grandsons.

Hikaru needed a profession that would challenge him yet not be too gruelling physically. He needed a job where physical disabilities would not necessarily inhibit him. His grandson needed a position where he can start young, when his body was still strong and active, able to weather the effects of his condition.

Hiroshi smiled as he realized that right there before him could be the answer to Hikaru's problem. Go was the supreme intellectual challenge. Go was probably the only field in the world that allowed children to become professionals and earn a money before they even graduate from junior high. Go would not prohibit a person from a wheelchair from playing, and many Go players were eccentric but well-respected. If Hikaru can somehow become a professional Go player, he would be able to attain respect and status, regardless of his disease.

And, Hiroshi thought, smoothing his hands on the surface, if there was a spirit that lodged in the goban, then it may be able to provide Hikaru with the guidance and companionship he would need for his life.

The very next day, he took his grandson to the recreation area where he and an intern had set up the goban and two new go-kes at one of the low tables.

"So, Hikaru, I think it's time for you to learn Go," Hiroshi began sternly. "It's a good game for bright boys like you."

He began to lay out an elementary problem, explaining carefully the rules of the game. Then he paused, waiting to see if Hikaru would respond.

It took several minutes before the boy's dull eyes fell onto the board. Then, to Hiroshi's delight, his grandson leaned forward and reached out. He eagerly pushed the goban towards Hikaru, waiting to see what he would do. The tiny, emaciated hand passed the stones, scattering them, and instead touched a corner of the board.

"Hikaru? What are you doing?" he asked, confused and bewildered. He looked at where Hikaru was touching the board but he could see nothing. He turned back to his grandson just in time to see the boy mouth something before slumping forward in a faint. The boy fell onto the board and Hiroshi scrambled to his feet, yelling for a nurse, a doctor, somebody.

WWWW

"Otou-san, what happened!" Mitsuko had come running into the waiting room. These days she only visited once a week, hard at work at her new job as a saleslady at a department store. She had brushed him off when he tried to talk to her about it, but Hiroshi knew that she was trying to save money for Hikaru's further treatments, which may involve a cocktail of expensive prescription drugs. It appeared that Masao's company didn't include Multiple Sclerosis in its coverage, and all the recurring tests and treatments the boy may need in the future were costly.

"Hikaru suddenly fainted," Hiroshi explained, pacing up and down the corridor. Yumi led her daughter to a chair and held her hand as they waited for the doctors.

It was two hours later before Yamaoka-sensei came out. He was looking slightly rumpled and haggard. Hiroshi stared at the man, seeing the tightness around his mouth and the weariness in his eyes. "I'm afraid I have some good and bad news for you," the doctor finally stated softly. Hiroshi couldn't look away even as he began to hear his family starting to cry. "The good news is that Hikaru is fine and that his fainting is not the sign of aggravated symptoms. The bad news is that I'm afraid Hikaru is in a state of coma at the moment."

"A coma? My son is in a coma?" Mitsuko said in a hysterical voice.

"Shhh," Yumi replied. "Hush, Mitsuko, Hikaru is still alive and well. I believe he will pull true." Mother and daughter held each other tight.

Hiroshi closed his eyes. There was nothing left for any of them to do but simply believe.

- End Chapter -

_School's extremely and unexpectedly hectic. There may be delays with regards to the next chapter._


	3. Chapter 3

_I'm sorry I'm such a terrible replier to reviews but I would just like to thank **Jinchuuriki, ochibisatori, VanillaTopping, amakasutook, SilverShiningStar, RisuNga, GoldenRat, dragonshadows, **and **Firehedgehog** for taking the time to let me know that you like it! **Jinchuuriki**, I will see if I can revise the summary to make it better. I do tend to prefer to bludgeon people harshly._

_Anyway, here's the latest chapter! I hope that you guys will like it and please let me know what you think._

**NOTES: **

_These are several facts MS that I have basically ignored or tweaked in order to fit into the story (and I hope this clears it up for people who have been wondering):_

_1. The typical age for a person to come down with MS is around their early to mid-twenties. It's rare that children are diagnosed with it, though there have been some cases._

_2. MS is rare in Japan and so Hikaru could be considered a medical anomaly._

_3. From what I found over the net, Japan's medical system is mainly handled by employee insurance. Someone pointed out that Japan has a universal health care system (I didn't find this in my research but am willing to stand corrected), which means that Hikaru's medical bills are more or less covered. To my knowledge, though, regardless of what system it is, usually insurance companies are reluctant to cover someone with a degenerating disease. So while visits to the hospital for broken bones may be covered by both the government and the employer health care insurance, conditions as rare as MS would probably not even be included in the package. In addition, there have been articles on how the Japanese government doesn't provide any kind of welfare for people who are mentally ill or in wheelchairs or otherwise incapacitated, that these people are discriminated against. In this fic, it is assumed that because Hikaru's condition is so rare and unknown his family doesn't have the insurance to cover the special tests, medication, and other treatments related to his condition._

_4. I have been assured by people that many MS patients can have a lifespan as long as a person without MS has, and that most live normal lives that aren't as affected by the disease. Please keep in mind, however, that Hikaru and his family are Japanese, who have never heard of MS and who live in a culture that puts emphasis in being a conforming, contributing member of society. Some of the ideas on MS shown here are stated the way they are because they were written with consideration to who was thinking them. So the doctor's view of MS will be radically different from Masao's from Hikaru's._

_ 5. 'saakaa' - Romaji pronounciation for soccer; 'basukebooru' - for basketball. They are rather difficult to find so if I'm wrong, please point it out and I'll try and correct it!   
_

_WWWW_

**III.**

To the secret inhabitant of the goban, time's passage was unnoticeable. All Sai was aware of was a timeless darkness that was all encompassing, with periods of light. It was as if Torajirou had just died a second ago yet centuries ago at the same time.

Then a strange feeling came. Sai found himself being drawn out of the darkness, and he closed his eyes, exulting at the realization that he was free once again.

But there was something strange. There was no mental connection. Instead, Sai could only get a flurry of images, all concentrating on a child in a strange white room on a strange white futon. He could feel sadness, anger, despair, hope, a bevy of emotions that seemed to be isolated from him by an unbreakable wall.

For some reason, Sai found himself studying the images of the boy. His own pain was forgotten as he realized how ill the child was. The more he stared, the more Sai felt a desire to help, to be with that boy as he had been with Torajirou until his death. The desire was a tiny seed of flame that grew until it became an all-consuming wish: _Would you open your heart to me that I might live in you so all your sorrows may be halved and all your joys doubled?_

Sai found himself engulfed by an incandescent light.

WWWW

When he opened his eyes, he was in a strange new meadow. There was green grass as far as the eye could see, and beautiful trees swaying tall from a distance. Sweet-smelling wildflowers dotted the landscape, adding beauty to the overall picture.

Sai pushed himself to his feet, carefully dusting the grass off his white robes. He looked around and eyed the mysterious square baskets standing to his left, several meters away from each other. To his right was a rectangle of gray mud with two pairs of upright poles and nets at each far side. Then from somewhere to the north there were sounds of splashing and giggling. Sai followed the echoes, a smile touching his mouth as the sheer joy he can hear in that laughter filled the aching void within him.

There he came upon the sea.

Sai gawked. For all of his life, he had lived amidst the rich forests and cities of ancient Japan. Being one of the Fujiwaras, even though he was a lesser cousin, he had grown up in a palace where every wish was catered to. All around him were the rice fields, lakes, and the jagged mountains where hermits and monsters lived. Even when he travelled to the Imperial capital, Sai had never been able to come close to the sea. Instead, he had only heard stories of it from travellers or the few nobles who had lands by the shore.

It lay before him like a glittering carpet of silver. Waves softly came onto the white, sandy beach where shells and crabs lay, half-submerged. Sai inhaled deeply, savouring the unforgettable, briny scent of the sea.

A small boy that looked vaguely familiar was standing waist-deep in the water, intently looking down before him. As Sai watched, quick brown hands lashed out and pulled an enormous, unrecognizable fish from the depths. The boy triumphantly heaved the writhing creature up in the air before tossing it back.

Suddenly, the memory of the last time he had stepped into a body of water, intent on drowning himself to erase his shame, came to his mind. He shook his head—he had been so young and proud then, so inflexible that he had broken like a sapling beneath a mighty typhoon. Now, Sai knew that he should have been like the elegant bamboo, then maybe he would not have wasted the precious gift of life the Kami-sama have given him.

"Hey, who are you?"

Sai blinked and stepped back, startled. The boy had come upon him quietly and now stood before him in an odd-looking loincloth, dripping wet. "I-I am Fujiwara-no-Sai," he replied with a slight stutter.

"Hmm, Sai, huh? I'm Hikaru! Nice to meet you!" Hikaru beamed at him. "Hey, do you want to fish with me?"

Sai looked askance. "Ah, er, no," he finally said, shivering at the idea of stepping into water, "you go ahead. I will look for shells." The boy shrugged and jumped back into the lake, continuing his fishing game.

Soon, Sai learned that his young companion remembered nothing of who he was, except for his name, or where they were. Instead, Hikaru seemed to treat everything as a playground.

After fishing, the boy dragged Sai over to where the strange implements had been set up. To the spirit's bemusement, he learned that they were supposed to be for strange games called 'saakaa' and 'basukebooru'. Hikaru disappeared into one of the forests and came back with two balls, one a leathery-brown one with black stripes, the other with white-and-black patches.

'Saakaa', to Sai's delight, was a fun game where he kicked the white-and-black ball so that it would go into Hikaru's net, or 'gooru' as the boy insisted they were called. The spirit was soon hoisting his wide-legged pants as he ran across the field, eagerly kicking the ball away from where his younger opponent was chasing after him. But Hikaru was canny and vicious; he was not above tripping the ghost or tricking him in order to steal the ball. In the end, it was Hikaru who won with 10 goals to Sai's 7.

Exhausted and laughing, they would sit beneath the trees where they would pluck ripe, juicy peaches and eat as many of them as they wanted. They drank sweet water from a bubbling brook, and ate fish raw. Hikaru showed Sai many new games, all of them physical, and they would play endlessly.

The two of them were lying on the grass, staring at the star-filled night-sky, when Hikaru asked Sai what game he liked best. The spirit smiled and said simply, "Igo."

"Igo?" the boy asked, turning his head to look at his companion in confusion. "That's the game my Jii-chan keeps talking about. The game with the board with lines and black and white stones, isn't it?"

"Your Jii-chan?" Sai asked carefully. He had tried asking his friend about his family, but Hikaru would change the subject or get angry and insist that he didn't remember. Sai would then keep his silence and go along with whatever the boy had in mind to do next.

"So what do you like about that game?" Hikaru replied cannily instead. Sai looked at him, then turned back to the stars.

"It may appear simple," he said dreamily, "but I have always thought of it as my star-laying game. In Go, I have the night-sky beneath my hands and I can create as many patterns of stars as I want. Together with my opponent, we can make a sky as beautiful as the one Kami-sama made for us."

"A star-laying game, huh? Did you know, Sai, that some of those stars out there aren't really stars at all?" Hikaru replied quietly. "Some of them are planets, like this world we live in. I have always liked that. I like that we are not limited by the sky, but that there is a universe before us."

"A universe," Sai repeated reverently. "A universe where worlds exist."

"Yeah. So maybe you should think of Go as a universe you can create, rather than simply think of it as a night-sky."

The spirit smiled enigmatically. "Go has many faces, Hikaru. To me, it is a night-sky, but to you, it may be a universe."

"…I'm tired, Sai. Let's go to sleep."

"Alright, Hikaru. Have sweet dreams."

"Good night, Sai."

When they awoke, Hikaru was sitting in front of a beautiful goban. As Sai watched, a smile behind his fan, the boy grumbled to himself as he clumsily picked up the slippery stones and put them on the board. First black then white, until a truly un-Go-like pattern emerged. To Sai, however, it was as lovely as any I hanami-ko /I he had ever seen.

"Oi, Sai, is this how you're supposed to do this?" Hikaru demanded.

Sai laid aside his fan and took up the go-ke. He let his hands wrap around the round bowl for long moments, savouring the solid sensation of warm wood against his palms. Sai looked deep into Hikaru's eyes. "Thank you, Hikaru," he said.

"It's no problem, Sai. So are there supposed to be rules to this game or are we just supposed to connect stones like this?"

Sai laughed and then set about correcting his young student on what to do.

small I Hanami-ko /I : "flower-viewing ko". This is a unilaterally favourable ko fight, where winning would inflict major damage on the other side but losing would only inflict minor damage to the player who started the fight. According to my sensei, they named it that way because it's like being at a cherry-blossom viewing, the pattern is very elegant and aesthetically-pleasing. /small

WWWWW

"Sai…I lied to you, you know," Hikaru whispered. It was night again in their timeless paradise, the time both had set aside for their hundreds of games of Go. He reached out to counter one of Sai's fierce offensive moves. "I…I didn't have amnesia…I remember everything…"

Sai dropped the white stone he had picked up and instead looked benevolently upon the boy who had come to mean so much to him. "I suspected, Hikaru. But why are you bringing it up now?"

"Because…" his friend hesitated. "Because…I cannot stay here…I need to go…go back…" Sai watched as the boy made tight fists, his face screwing up in misery. "I don't want to go back, Sai! I want to stay here and play with you! I want to stay here forever!"

"But you have your Jii-chan waiting for you, right, Hikaru?" Sai replied gently. "How do you think he feels back there, while you are over here? Do you think staying here would make anyone happy?"

"It would make Otou-san happy!" the boy retorted fiercely. To the spirit's shock, Hikaru violently swiped at the goban, sending stones scattering. "Otou-san hates me! He wishes I was dead! He'd be happy if I were dead!"

"Hikaru, your father would not wish any such thing!" Sai exclaimed, moving so that he can hug his friend to him.

"Otou-san doesn't want to have a sick son!" Hikaru sobbed into the spirit's robes. "Even when I tried to kill myself, Otou-san didn't care! I heard him! All he cared about was how expensive it was to keep me in the hospital! He says that since I'm going to die anyway, there's no point spending money on me!"

"Oh, Hikaru…" Sai rocked the boy, feeling tears flowing down his cheeks. That a father could say such a thing to his own son…

"I hate it too! That's why I tried to kill myself! I don't want to live as a cripple! I don't want to be a burden!" Hikaru kept whispering. "But the stupid doctors saved me! I wanted to die but they won't let me!"

At this, Sai thrust Hikaru an arm's length away. Firmly he grasped the boy's quivering chin and angled it so that green met purple. "Hikaru, never ever throw your life away!" Sai stated vehemently, "Promise me! Life is far too precious for you to throw it away so casually! Regardless of what your father thinks!"

The boy gaped, momentarily shocked, before shoving violently away. He clambered to his feet and glowered. "What do you know, Sai! I don't even know what you are! What you're doing here! What do you know about my life, huh! Its my life! Not yours!"

The spirit gracefully, majestically stood up. He towered over the small child, his face like carved stone. "I am Fujiwara-no-Sai of the Fujiwara Clan, and the blood of emperors flow in our veins. I am Fujiwara-no-Sai, the greatest Go player for a thousand years. I have taught the Emperor, I have played the greatest minds in Torajirou's time, and I understand more than you think, Hikaru."

Hikaru could only stare at him.

"Do you think you are the only one who has tried to kill himself? I too have tried and unlike you, I was unfortunate enough to have succeeded. You are the one who don't understand, Hikaru. I do not know how sickly you are, but I would give almost anything to once again be able to live in a physical body, even if it's only for a short time! Do you know what it means when you have thrown away this gift of life the Kami-sama has given us? It means that you have given up! It means that you have allowed your fears, your shame, to overcome you!" Sai lashed at the air with his fan, causing a loud, whistling noise. His sole audience jumped.

"Many soldiers have killed themselves rather than suffer shame. I too followed their path. But I didn't understand what I did! I didn't understand what I was giving up! To kill yourself, Hikaru, is to give up on the love your mother has for you, your Jii-chan, your friends!" Sai stated emphatically. "To kill yourself is to run away from life! What do you have in your life that is so difficult that you can no longer bear to live? That you are sick? That you are dying? If you are already dying, then why are you trying to hasten it? Why not spend what time you have left living?"

"Live what, Sai!" Hikaru screamed back at him. "Live a life as a cripple? Live with my dad who hates me? Live with my mom who is always crying every time she sees me? Live until everyone hates me and leaves me alone! I'd rather die!"

Sai fell to his knees before the sobbing child. Tenderly, he cupped his face. "Hikaru, you're not alone. I don't hate you, Hikaru---in fact I adore you. It is thanks to you that once again I can play my beloved Go. It is because of you that I have learned to play saakaa, and basukebooru, and gorufu, and can eat peaches and cherries and plums once more. It is you who have given me life again, sharing stories of your world and your time and listening to mine. All these things, Go, new games, friendship, love…these are all the things I have foolishly thrown away when I drowned myself in a river in shame…Hikaru, do not make the same mistake I did…do not throw everything away because of one man…it is not your father who will most regret it, it will be you…"

Hikaru cried harder. The spirit held him close. "Hikaru, I promise you that for as long as Kami-sama allows me to, I will never leave you. No matter what happens, I will be there. I will be your friend for as long as you want me to, Hikaru. I promise."

Sai repeated the words firmly, engraving them in his heart. "I promise I will never ever leave you, Hikaru."

**-End Chapter 3-**


	4. Chapter 4

_Title: **DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION**_

_Author: Lady Addiction_

_Fandom: Hikaru no Go_

_Pairings: None_

_Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities_

_Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life.  
_

_DISCLAIMER: Hikaru no Go doesn't belong to me._

_SUMMARY: In another universe, chibi-Hikaru is diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis._

NOTES:

This chapter wouldn't have been possible without the help of **Harumi **and **Lynlyn**, for their insights and encouragement! -hugs-

Because of the way I wrote Hikaru's father, I guess it is inevitable that he may be or will be considered 'bad' or 'unjust'. This is not necessarily the case. Masao is human and he has his own dreams and hopes, all of which is directly or indirectly impacted by Hikaru's illness. I hope I'll be able to show that in this chapter.

Please note that Masao's views on living with MS is not necessarily the reality. This is all from his point-of-view and remember, the Japanese have little to no experience with Multiple Sclerosis and the ramifications and the descriptions of MS symptoms and possible effects are many and can be quite frightening.

**Justareviewer, HarbringerLady, FanfictionDreamer, Hiakaru, Hitokiri-san, tati1, Akki no Tama, liankitty, kayue, liar-just-a-liar, risunga, and GoldenRat**: Thank you so very much for your reviews and words of encouragement (and correction)! Your support is muchly appreciated.

WWWW

**IV. **

Shindou Masao had always thought of himself as a good man, a good father, a good husband. He worked hard at his firm, taking on project after project with little or no complaint---not even during those after-office drinking hours when he had coworkers bitterly whining about lost promotions, demotions, workload, and pay. He never strayed from his wife, even when the temptation was there in the form of the extremely pretty and vivacious office lady in the next door building who he saw more often than Mitsuko. He didn't have a strong closeness with his son, but he gave the boy food and shelter and affable evening conversations---just like his father did with him.

He was a good man, he thought, maybe a little proudly, in those times when he overhead gossip on wives and children being abused, on extra-marital sexual affairs, on dramatic conflicts between parent and child.

But at that moment, as he sat in the noisy bar with his jovial, red-cheeked coworkers, Masao couldn't help but think about his only son in a coma and stricken by some uncurable disease as he nursed his beer.

Sickness was nothing new to him, nothing new to any human being. Masao himself suffered from the yearly cold and sniffles, though he never let it affect his work. But Hikaru had an uncurable condition! Shortly after the diagnosis had been given, Masao had talked with Yamaoka-sensei privately and found out that there will be times when Hikaru may not be able to walk! What company would hire such a sickly man? And Hikaru was only ten! If he was already falling into commas and needing wheelchairs at the age of ten, what will happen when he turned 30? 40?

Masao's hand clenched tight against the slippery, cold surface of his beer bottle.

It didn't help that when he had contacted his health insurance provider, he was informed that Hikaru's condition was not covered under policy and that all his treatments and medication must be privately paid. Masao had discussed the treatments with Hikaru's doctor and some were astronomical, compared to how much he made and how much of his disposable income was already committed to regular household expenses.

In the end, Masao didn't want the long-term financial or personal responsibility needed for Hikaru's continuing good health. He didn't want the burden of caring for an invalid child.

He didn't want Hikaru with this state of health.

He had other plans, other dreams, other hopes. He had planned for him and Mitsuko to be able to travel the world for a year once Hikaru went to college. He had planned to retire early in his 50s and open a small business. He had planned to have a son that was either a J-League player or a hard-working salaryman_ (just like himself) _with a wife and kids.

All those dreams were now on the verge of evaporating in light of his child's condition. The boy was not smart enough or hardworking enough, as his elementary grades attested, to get into a prestigious high school or college, which would have ensured a good position in a company that may be willing to overlook his health issues. He will probably also never marry because who would want to take care of a husband who can't work? And his health would mean that he won't be able to work properly in a trade for no shop-keeper or owner would take in a helper or apprentice who wasn't able to do everything he was required to do.

No matter how he wished otherwise, Masao knew that Hikaru as he now was had no future.

And he knew he wasn't a good man for thinking this---but he wondered if they, including Hikaru, were not all better off if the boy never woke up.

_-End Chapter-_


	5. Chapter 5

_Thanks to **Ang3l-Dark3n, DarkAngstScary, Umeko the God, KagomeGirl21, star, whiterose03, Slicer, hy-nguyen, FanFictionDreamer, **and **GoldenRat **for all their reviews! A number of you has commented on the shortness of the chapter---I can't apologize since some chapters are difficult to write and, therefore, become short. I'm afraid that the next few will probably be a little too short for your liking. Still I hope that you will all still enjoy the fic!_

**_NOTE: Just in case there is confusion, this fic is helped greatly by Dephanie (her FFnet name and who goes by the LJ-name "Harumi"--- she told me that there is actually a user called "Harumi" on FFnet and they're not the same person.), Suvius, and Lynlyn---all three of whom continually give me their support and help! -Hugs-_**

_Title: **DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION**  
Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities  
Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life._

_WWWWW  
_

**V.**

Hiroshi had been reading a folk story aloud to his grandson when he saw the hand closest to him twitch. The book fell from his nerveless fingers as he stared, grateful tears running down his cheeks. He scrambled to push a button for a nurse.

Two days later, the hospital reported that Hikaru had opened his eyes.

WWWW

:Ne, Hikaru, let's play Go:

The young boy sighed exasperatedly and put down the manga he was reading. He had been back home for little more than a week and apart from his new cellphone and the intercom system, it seemed as if nothing had changed.

That was an illusion.

Many things had changed in the four months he had been in the hospital. Hikaru had become the reluctant witness to his parents' arguing, the hapless victim of his father's cold silence, and the laughable dunce in his class.

It was mainly due to Sai's warm presence, Akari's friendship, and his grandparents' continuing love that Hikaru was able to keep his spirits up. Still, as much as he liked Sai, Hikaru grew tired of the ghost's nagging.

He glared at his persistent and annoying friend. :Sai, we just played a game an hour ago! Besides, I'm supposed to play Jii-chan again tonight! I'm tired of Go:

:Hikaru, how can you be tired of Go: The young boy blocked his ears with his hands in a futile attempt to stave off yet another of Sai's lengthy and flowery monologues on the beauty of Go. He truly didn't understand why his grandfather or Sai liked the game so much. Sure, he enjoyed the games when he won against his grandfather, but Hikaru didn't have the same passion for the game as his Jii-chan and Sai did. He tried to think of a way to distract Sai.

:Hikaru? Hikaru, where are you going:

Hikaru tromped past Sai, rubbing the back of his head. "I'm hungry. I'm going to go see if Kaa-san made me ramen like I asked."

:I don't think ramen's good for you: the ghost replied doubtfully. Hikaru stuck his tongue out at the ghost. :Biiiiii-da! I don't care! I have to eat all those vitamin pills and vegetables and stuff all the time anyway! One bowl of ramen's got to be better than those crap:

:One bowl? But you never eat only one, Hikaru:

The boy ran out of his room, hoping that he could somehow outrun the nagging phantom. He skidded into the much smaller kitchen. His mother was sitting at the table, peeling potatoes. "Kaa-san, I'm hungry! What are we having for dinner?" Hikaru pounced on the refrigerator and began to rummage through the contents. He frowned as he noticed that there were far too many green and yellow vegetables and there was no sign of anything like mochi cakes or meat-buns. "Can I have some ramen?"

"I'm making some beef-and-vegetable stew for tonight, Hikaru," his mother replied sharply. "It's much better for you than ramen."

"But, Kaa-san, ramen's ---"

"Hikaru! Remember your condition! You don't want to go back to the hospital, do you?" Hikaru scowled at the angry look his mother directed at him. "Now if you're really hungry, I've made some congee for you. It's on the stove."

"I hate congee." Hikaru stomped out of the kitchen and ran out of the house. "Stupid Kaa-san! What's wrong about having ramen? It's got protein and carbohydrates and all that stuff the doctor said I need, doesn't it?" He complained to Sai. The ghost looked helpless and Hikaru snorted. Of course, he would end up with a phantom who's only good at Go and useless at everything else.

"Oi, Hikaru!" Toshikawa Akito from the house two doors down was waving at him from the front gate. Hikaru grinned and ran to meet his friend.

"Looks like you're fine," the short but athletic boy continued. "Hey, me, Junpei, and Yuushi are going over to the arcade. Do you want to go with us?"

Hikaru's eyes brightened. It had been months since he'd last visited an arcade. "Sure! Just let me go ask for money, okay?"

"Okay, I'll wait for you here."

The green-eyed boy sped back to the kitchen. His mother had moved to the sink where she was putting the potato chunks into a basin. She looked up in surprise. "Hikaru-chan, is something wrong?"

"Ne, Kaa-san, Akito-kun and the others are inviting me to the arcade! Can I have some money to go with them?"

His mother's face darkened. "Why do you need to spend money on such useless things, Hikaru-chan? Besides, don't you have a lot of homework to catch up on? You've missed over two months of classes already!"

"I can do all that tomorrow, Kaa-san! Please!" Hikaru put on his best pleading expression.

"I said no, Hikaru! What do you think we are, made of money? If you must, go to the playground and play with Akari-chan!" With that, his mother turned her back to him.

Hikaru curled his hands into tight fists. "You never used to have a problem giving me some money to go to the arcade before!" he yelled. "What's so different now?"

"Hikaru-chan, is this how you speak to your mother! I don't know what's going on with you, you've become such a spoiled child! Go to your room, young man, and do your homework! Don't you think you've given your father and me enough problems already!"

He could only stare at his mother in disbelief. Then, ignoring his mother's shocked cries, he ran out of the house past the surprised Akito and continued on towards the park.

In the small sandy lot where slides, monkey bars, and assorted outdoor toys had been assembled, Hikaru crawled into the tiny doorway of a small plastic house. He closed the little green windows and curled up in the darkness. Sai tried to follow but the space inside the house was barely big enough for Hikaru. He had to settle for kneeling besides the windows.

:Hikaru, your mother didn't mean it. She's just tired: Sai said consolingly. :She's been so busy lately. I'm sure she's not really angry with you.:

It continued like that for long moments, Sai trying to comfort the boy but Hikaru remained quiet. Suddenly, a movement at the corner of his eye attracted the ghost's attention. To his relief, he recognized Hikaru's grandfather coming their way. Jii-chan was carrying a paper bag. :Hikaru, your grandfather's here.:

Sai moved aside so that the elderly man could kneel in front of the windows. There was no door so the black-and-red of Hikaru's sneakers peeked out, revealing his hiding place.

"Hikaru? Hikaru? Jii-chan's here with some taiyaki. They're freshly made and I bought some with red-bean and custard, just like you like it," the old man cajoled. "Come out here and eat them with me before they get cold."

The two waited patiently. Finally, one of the windows slid open partially. Hikaru peeked out, his eyes a little blood-shot but there were no other signs that he'd been crying. "Ora yo," his grandfather said, smiling gently. He passed Hikaru one of the steaming-hot, fish-shaped pastries that was making even Sai drool. The old man switched from a kneeling position to a cross-legged one facing the same direction as Hikaru, and took out a piece for himself. Sai watched them eat, feeling a warmth spreading through him.

"Hikaru, your mother told me what happened. I'm sorry that you had to hear that but Mitsuko-chan has been very worried for the past three months. She's probably very tired right now and not thinking clearly," his grandfather explained.

"Jii-chan…" Hikaru frowned, then looked away. "Can I have another?"

"Of course, Hikaru! I bought them for the two of us!" Another pastry was passed through the window. "Hikaru, you know your mother didn't mean it, don't you? She loves you."

There was a long, uncomfortable silence before: "I know, Jii-chan." It came out dull to Sai's ears, but Hikaru's grandfather didn't seem to notice.

"That's good, Hikaru. Now, why don't you come out of there and we can go check out to the Kakei Stadium to see when's the next big event?"

Hikaru crawled out of his hiding place, taking his time to dust himself off. He helped his grandfather to his feet. "Good idea, Jii-chan." The boy beamed as he followed the older man.

Sai came after them, walking more sedately. He held the tip of his fan to his lips thoughtfully, but he refrained from saying anything.

-End Chapter-


	6. Chapter 6

_Title: DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION  
Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities  
Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life._

_I'm back! Man, it's very difficult getting back into writing this. I do confess that I haven't watched or read the series for about a year, so well...I'm probably off. _

_For the people who continued to have faith in this story, thank you for sticking it with me._

_To Dephanie, I hope your time with JET will be greatly blessed and that you'll have lots of stories to tell during and after!   
_

WWWW

**VI.**

When Touya Akira turned ten, the game of Go mutated subtly. Suddenly, his games were watched a little more closely, his father's comments a little more critical. Suddenly, there was more pressure for him to study hard in preparation for the pro exams . . . to teach Go . . . to demonstrate to the general public just how good he can play.

Suddenly, Go was not really a game anymore; it was life.

His Go became an exhibit. Rumours of his tremendous talent had created exceedingly high expectations. His father's students now demanded more of him, always comparing him with his father. Pro exams, tournaments, title matches, and insei were the constant bywords in any conversation within his vicinity. Akira felt more and more the need to rise up to the demand that he can do better, that Touya Kouya's legacy would live in him.

Because of this, more and more Akira felt constrained to ensure that his Go remained as flawless as possible. The time spent poring over books on the game suddenly doubled, competing with the time spent with regular studying. His teaching games were no longer truly games; somehow, it had mutated into work, down to the constant soft smile on his face and the professional tone he used.

Even his games with his father had changed. Akira now felt the eyes of his father like some high-intensity searchlight, pointing out every single error without fail. Akira studied more before matches with his father than he did for his school examinations.

It shouldn't be said that the enormous pressure crushed Akira; rather, he thrived in it, growing faster and faster until even his most dedicated detractor would say that he was a credit to his father.

However, the constant eyes watching, the unrelenting praise of his elders, changed Akira. Akira learned to minimize his risks. He mastered how to utilize each hand to maximum efficiency. He became proficient at all the proven attacks, counterattacks, and defences used by Go greats for decades, even centuries.

By the time Akira turned twelve, he was, in a lot of ways, textbook perfect in his Go game. Combined with judgment honed by a lifetime of games, Akira was well-above most other players, even the pros, and he knew it.

But technical proficiency was not enough in a game of masters.

And when Kuwabara-Honinbou himself pointed this out after a game ("You can train a monkey to reach technical perfection"), Akira was infuriated.

"Kuwabara-sensei, you insult me," he replied coldly, his face pale with rage. Spots of red inflamed his cheeks as he stared narrow-eyed at his opponent.

The elderly man squinted at him from across the table, rubbing his lip with a crooked index finger.

"Play Sai," the title-holder replied shortly. With that, he cleaned his side of the board and left the Institute's large, open recreation room abruptly. Akira stared down unseeingly at the board.

The minute he got home, Akira logged into WorldIgoNet. His father had disdained Sai, disliking anyone who chose to hide in the shadows. But apparently, Kuwabara-Honinbou thought that he, Touya Akira, had something to learn from the notorious NetGo upstart.

Later, it made Akira numb to realize that the old master was right.

_-End Chapter-_

_There were points when this chapter was easy to write, and points where it was like pulling teeth. I do hope that I did Akira's character honour and I hope that you guys enjoyed it as well._


	7. Chapter 7

_**Title: DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION  
Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities  
Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life.**_**  
**

_Wow, thank you so very much all of you for taking the time to review and let me know what you think! It's a definite encouragement to know that you guys are reading it! I hope that you will like the next chapter. Please be warned for errors---it's unbeta-ed and if you notice any, please let me know so I can fix it._

_I hope you have fun and please continue your reviews! _

_WWW _

Money.

That was the root of all his family's problems.

Hikaru shoved his fists into his jeans pockets as he wandered around the Akenoyama shopping district. He passed by the small storefronts with their multitude of displays, stopping now and again at one of the sporting goods stores or at an electronics shop to check out their wares. Sai followed behind him, eagerly running back and forth as he marvelled at the new things the world had invented since Torajirou's time. Hikaru only grunted and nodded at the ghost's bubbling comments, more concerned with the problem of money.

Too often now, he would find himself huddling against his bedroom door, listening to the loud voices coming from his parents' room.

Most of the time the arguments were over minor things, like dinner.

_["Mitsuko, what was that you fed us? You've burned the food! Don't you know how expensive beef is?"_

"_It's only just a little burnt, anata! I was helping Hikaru with his homework and forgot to check it! It's fine!" _

"_Mitsuko, when I come home from work, I expect to be able to relax and eat a good dinner. How can I relax with food like this?"_

"_Anata, I'm sorry I'll be more careful next time."_

However, there was the occasional quarrel that revealed there was something more deeply wrong than what was shown on the surface.

_["Mitsuko, why are you spending so much on the groceries? Do we really need all these?"_

"_Anata, you know the doctor said that Hikaru-chan has to eat properly or he may get sick again! Besides, I was very careful to buy these on sale!"_

"_And what about these classes Hikaru's taking? Swimming lessons? Meditation? They're too expensive! Why can't he just go out and play basketball and soccer like the other boys? He's doing fine, isn't he?"_

"_No, he can't! Have you seen how rough those games are?! What if Hikaru-chan gets injured? The last thing he needs right now is a broken leg or something worse!"_

"_Well, what's wrong with just buying him a DVD of these classes? He doesn't have to go to a class!"_

"_But Hikaru-chan's having fun with his classes! He was telling me the other day about how his swimming teacher was telling him that he's getting much better! He wouldn't need swimming lessons soon! Anata, can't we just give him another month of these lessons? I'll find some way to cut back on the groceries," his mother pleaded. _

"_Mitsuko, you know these classes are useless anyway! It's not as if Hikaru's going to get better…"_

"_Masao, why are you acting like this? He's your son! Don't you want him to live a healthy life? Why are you putting money over your son's health?!"_

"_That is because we are not rich, Mitsuko! My salary can only cover so much! I don't see the point of wasting money on medicines that are not going to do any good!"_

"_You're wrong, anata! The doctor says it will help Hikaru become well!"_

Whenever they began to hear the loud voices, Sai would jump up and begin to pester him. Hikaru would turn his back against the door, swipe angrily at his face, and do his best to concentrate on the ghost, rather than his parents or his condition. Sai would at times draw his attention by singing ancient songs that were popular in his time, or ask Hikaru about all the sports games they watched on TV. Most of the time, they played Go, with Sai patiently correcting him and teaching him better moves.

But no matter how hard the ghost tried to distract him, Hikaru never forgot that he was a burden in his father's eyes.

It was obvious to him that because of his disease, their family was having financial difficulties. Before his mother would let him buy new clothes or a game every so often; now, she kept telling him that he had more than enough clothes and toys whenever he brought it up. His pocket money had not diminished but Hikaru saw his grandfather giving his mother a suspicious envelope during one of his visits; Jii-chan had never done that before. They began to eat more and more tofu and beancurd substitutes instead of fish or red-meat, and the only time Hikaru managed to eat Pocky or drink soda was when he bought it off a vending machine himself.

One time, while he was over at Akari's house, Hikaru had even thought to ask his friend about jobs.

_["Ne, Akari, what do you want to be when you grow up?"_

_The girl who was flipping through their History text while Hikaru was flipping through channels looked up. She frowned thoughtfully. "Hmmm. I think I want to be a journalist like Onishi Youko-san! I love reading her stories about what's happening with idols and movie stars and people like that! It'd be interesting if I could travel a lot, wouldn't it, Hikaru?"_

"_Ehhh, do journalists make a lot of money?"_

"_Huh, I don't really think so. My dad used to say that if you want to make a lot of money, you should become a lawyer or doctor or businessman. But I don't want to be one of those!" She stuck out her tongue in distaste. "Besides, being a lawyer or doctor means that you have to have high grades all the time and go to the best schools. You probably have to be at the top ten all the time at school!"_

"_Do you really need high grades to make a lot of money, Akari?"_

_The girl shook her head. "Well, I think a lot of the really good jobs do. I know that's why Okaa-san and Otou-san are always telling me to get good grades and go to university. Otou-san even told me once that if I'm not a good student, I might find myself sweeping the floors at the NcDonald's restaurant by the mall! I'd hate that!"_

_Hikaru continued to flick through channels, though he paid no attention to what was on the screen. Instead, he was gnawing his lower lip as he thought hard about Akari's words. He knew she must be right – his mother had frequently tried to tell him that he needed to get better grades or he's going to ruin his life. It had just seemed too stupid. After all, he didn't need high grades if he could become the star forward at one of the J-League teams, did he?_

_The boy inhaled sharply. But he couldn't be a pro player now, could he? Nobody wants a crippled player in their team! He began to feel that all-too familiar burning sensation at the pit of his stomach._

"_Ne, Hikaru, what about you? What do you want to be when you grow up?"_

_I want to be healthy, he wanted to say. Instead, what came out was "I don't know. I've always thought I'd be a professional soccer player or something."_

"_But, Hikaru, how can you be a professional soccer player now when you don't play soccer anymore?" she asked in a puzzled tone. She moved from the bed to sit beside him, her wide eyes clear and piercing. Hikaru looked away. _

"_Well, hehehe," he replied, nervously rubbing his knee, "I've changed my mind. Soccer's stupid anyway! But now I don't know what I'm going to do. The only thing I know is whatever job it is, it has to pay lots and lots of money."_

"_I don't really think soccer's stupid," Akari said doubtfully, "but, Hikaru, it's going to be hard to get a job that pays a lot of money. My mom says my dad's in a really good position at his company but we're not rich or anything like that."_

"_You're rich!" Hikaru protested, whipping his head to stare accusingly at her. "Your family went on a trip to England last summer, didn't you? And you went to Thailand the year before that!"_

"_But Yatsuhiko-kun, Jessica-chan, Emiko-chan, and Yuushi-kun has gone to many places like that before too and they're not really rich!" she disputed. "The only rich person in school is Tatsuya-kun. He has his own driver, doesn't he? We only have one car and it's pretty old!"_

"_Hmm, yeah, Kunimoshi is rich. I wonder how they became rich?" Hikaru pondered. Kunimoshi Tatsuya was in the top class and he was also in the kendo club. However, the two of them only knew each other in passing, unlike Akari who was class representative like Kunimoshi and so attended meetings with the other boy. _

"_Well, Tatsuya-kun says that his father runs a big company with factories abroad. He even said that his father's thinking of sending him to America to go to one of the private schools there rather than stay here in Japan," Akari said authoritatively. "His father wants him to become a lawyer so Tatsuya-kun is always complaining at the meetings about how his father's always telling him to get better and better scores at exams."_

_Hikaru poked at the carpet. "That's so stupid. He's already at the top ten in the school. What does it matter if he's number five or number one?"_

_Akari shrugged. "It probably has something to do with family honour and being rich and all that. You know, Hikaru, before you think about jobs, you should think about Junior High. We'll be moving onto sixth grade in two months."_

"_Yeah, that's right." Hikaru was about to ask another question when Sai coughed politely. He turned to where the ghost had been sitting beside him throughout the conversation. _

_:Hikaru, I think it's time to return home for dinner.:_

_:Okay, Sai.: "Oi, Akari, I need to get back home now." He tossed the remote control aside and stood up, stretching. Sai stood up more gracefully and walked over to the door. Hikaru hesitated. _

"_Akari?" _

"_Hmmm?"_

"_I still have to do a lot of homework and…uh…" He looked away, scratching his chin with his index finger. _

"_Do you want my help, Hikaru?" He peeked over his shoulder where Akari was standing with a smile. "I know you missed so many classes because you were in the hospital. It's alright, I don't mind."_

_His shoulders slumped in relief as he grinned at her. "Ah, that would be great. Thanks, Akari. Can I come over tomorrow night?"_

"_Sure."_

_:Hikaru, look out!:_

At the ghost's sudden yell, Hikaru's head came up. To his shock, he saw that he had accidentally wandered off the sidewalk and was now right in the middle of the road. A car was coming towards him and he found himself completely frozen.

Suddenly, he was engulfed by a strong force that took him to the other side of the street. Something heavy landed on top of him, causing him to wheeze and gasp. Hikaru began to struggle, trying to push whatever it was off him.

It moved on its own and Hikaru scrambled away. Sai had ran after him and was now kneeling at his side, panic-stricken lavender eyes scanning him for any injuries.

"Oi, kid, are you alright?"

Hikaru looked to see a boy a few years older than him dusting his clothes off. He was tall and broad, with spiky red-streaked hair and wild, ferocious eyes. This boy, Hikaru suddenly realized, was the one who saved him. He tried to get up on his feet and stopped when a large, callused hand moved in front of him. Tentatively, Hikaru took it and allowed the other boy to pull him up. "Um, thanks," he said, flushing and looking down. He busily whacked at his clothes.

"Hey, no problem. Just watch where you're going next time, okay? I might not be here to save you." The boy smirked at him.

Hikaru found himself scowling. He ignored Sai who was fretting beside him. "I don't need anyone to save me," he retorted proudly, "I can save myself!"

"Heh, good attitude. What's your name, squirt?"

"Don't call me a squirt! My name's Hikaru! Shindou Hikaru!"

"Where's your mother, squirt? You shouldn't be wandering around Akenoyama on your own." Kaga began looking around. "And stay on the west end of the district, the east is bad for kids like you."

"I'm not a child!" Hikaru argued fiercely. He glowered right into Kaga's animal-like eyes. "I don't need my mom to walk around Akenoyama! Hey, you should introduce yourself!"

"The name's Kaga Tetsuo! You can call me Kaga-sama," the older boy replied magnanimously. He ignored the face the sixth-grader made. "Now go home before something else happens to you!" Kaga shouldered his bookbag and started walking down one of the side alleys away from Akenoyama's main street. Hikaru hesitated, seeing the old tenement apartments, the street courts with their chainlink fences and graffiti-covered walls, and the dangerous-looking youths who came in and out of the pool halls and arcades.

Akenoyama was his grandfather's district and Hikaru refused to let somebody chase him off. While Sai futilely tried to tug him away, Hikaru marched defiantly after the older boy. Kaga let him follow for a few more minutes before he confronted him.

"Kid, look, I know you're grateful I saved you and all but really, I don't like kids so buzz off before I do something nasty," Kaga told him, leaning down to sneer into Hikaru's face. The younger boy stood his ground.

"I'm bored," Hikaru announced.

"So? Do I look like I care?"

"I want to know what you're doing here and I'm going to follow you until I find out!"

Their eyes met in a fearless staring contest. Hikaru refused to blink or look away --- he may be sick but he was not a coward!

"You're not going to go away until I beat you, are you?" Kaga finally stated, still holding his stare unblinking.

"Not even if you beat me," he answered.

Suddenly, the older teen broke off the contest and chuckled. He reached out to ruffle Hikaru's hair. "You're a brat, squirt, but I like you anyway. So, wanna hang out and play some games then?"

"Sure. But you pay," Hikaru stated, falling into step beside the older teen. He turned his head to glare at Sai who was despondently following after them.

"Oi, oi! You're the one tagging along, squirt! Okay, here's what we're going to do---I pick a game and if you can beat me, I'll pay for all the games you play."

"It's a deal!"

Kaga grinned widely and led the way into a small doorway. Hikaru looked in and stared. It was a pachinko parlour.

Rows and rows of colourful machines were somehow crammed inside the tight space. The ceiling was hung with eye-catching banners and advertisements. In between rows there were barely enough room for the chairs and people to walk through.

Since it was close to dusk, the parlour was half-filled with teenagers and dark-suited salarymen. Loud noises, both mechanical and human, rang through the air, accompanied by annoying marching-band music. Kaga slipped through the narrow aisles, leaving Hikaru to slither his way in.

_:Hikaru, where are we?!: _Sai asked, astonished at the intense atmosphere around them. _:What are all these people doing?:_

_:It's a pachinko parlour, Sai.:_ Hikaru racked his brain for what little he knew and understood about pachinko. Like Go, he had always thought of it more as an adult's gameand boring besides. Still, there was a parlour in his own neighbourhood and he was classmates with the son of the owner of the parlour. :_ Sawada's dad runs a pachinko parlour and he told us all about it. Remember him, he's always cleaning out his nose? Basically, people exchange money for those little balls, which they then put into the machines. What you want to do is try and get those small metal balls to go into special holes so that you get even more balls. The more ball bearings you get back, the more things you can get when you exchange the ball bearings at the counter.:_ Hikaru pushed his way through and breathed a sigh of relief when he finally made it to where Kaga was standing. A teenager was standing behind the counter where a display of various goods were held. Hikaru nodded his head towards a machine where an old man was feeding his collection of ball bearings. _: Sawada said that those machines give you a special ticket depending on how many balls you collected. Then you can exchange the ticket for candy or drinks or stuff at the counter. Once he got a pretty cool keychain.: _Hikaru snickered and continued, _:Sawada also said that some people exchange their drinks or cigarettes or whatever at another counter somewhere outside for money.:_

_:That's, that's gambling!: _Hikaru covered his face as he laughed harder at his friend's shocked and disapproving expression. _:That's it! Hikaru, we should leave this place!:_

_:Aw, Sai, come on! It's a new game! Don't you want to see what happens? Besides, what am I going to do? Go home and listen to Otou-san yell at Okaa-san again?:_ He looked away from the ghost and came to Kaga's side. The other boy had been impatiently tapping his feet, having already obtained a bucket of pachinko balls.

_:…I'm sorry, Hikaru…:_

He heaved a mental sigh at the spirit's woebegone expression. _:It's alright, Sai. It's not your fault. Come on, let's just have some fun for a bit, okay?:_

_:…alright…:_

"Oi, squirt! What are you taking so long for? I don't have all day, you know," Kaga told him.

"Hey, Kaga, you didn't tell me you have a kid in here," the teenager behind the counter complained. "He's not allowed to play or it'll cost me my job."

"Don't worry, Keigo," Kaga assured him. "I'm playing. I just have to watch him. Neighbour's kid, you know." Hikaru scowled at that, crossing his arms in his chest. He was ten-years-old, not a kid!

"Hah, like anyone'd ever let you babysit. Fine but get out of here quick."

Kaga waved and herded Hikaru into one of the pachinko machines. "Okay," he said, leaning down to whisper in Hikaru's ear. "I'm going to give you one ball. If you manage to win a prize, I'll take you to the arcade and you can all the games you want for the next three hours. If you lose the ball, you have to pay on your own. Deal?"

Hikaru stared at the tall machine with its brightly-flashing display. "Deal." He dug into the bucket, took a ball, and fed it into the machine. All three watched as the ball made its hypnotic progress, causing the centerslots to spin, just like in a casino slot-machine. Slowly, the slots began to stop spinning. They held their breath: 7-7-7! It was a jackpot!

Jaws dropped and people turned to stare as the machine poured out hundreds of the tiny balls. Kaga even had to run and fetch another bucket. The teen was chuckling and rubbing his hands as he eagerly fed the balls into the ticket machine.

Hikaru and Sai were forced to wait in front of a convenience store while Kaga ducked out of sight behind the parlour. When he came back, the other boy was broadly grinning. "You, squirt, are the luckiest beginner alive! You just won me 50,000 yen! And because I'm a good guy, I'm splitting it with you."

The fifth-grader could only stare at the handful of bills shoved in his face. "Are you serious?" he breathed. "We won this?!" He took the bills and began numbly flipping through them. 25,000 yen right there in his hands, all because of one 4-yen ball.

Kaga winked. "Too bad you're under-aged! With your luck, we can make millions at the parlours!"

"Millions?" Hikaru's eyes were sparkling. Was this the answer to his family's money problem?

The older teen took one look at him and began to frown. "Hey, Shindou, I was just joking, you know," Kaga said seriously. "Pachinko parlours are not for kids. They're bad news."

"Hey, then why did you take me there?!"

"It was a whim." He shrugged. "I don't like pachinko. I've heard of kids whose parents had lost so much money in those places that it was ridiculous. Even worse, I heard people can get addicted to crap like that --- easy money, you know. But I thought one time wasn't a big deal and I wasn't expecting you to win big. My advice is stay out of places like that, yakuza and gangs are always connected to pachinko parlours."

Hikaru shoved the money into his wallet. "But what if I need money?"

"If you need money, find another way," the other boy replied bluntly. "First, you're way too young. Second, although playing pachinko is not really illegal, exchanging your prizes for money is and you don't want to get involved in illegal stuff. Third, you're going to lose more than you're going to win after enough time. It's not worth it in the long run and besides, you got to have pride, kid. You can do better than hang around smelly, noisy pachinko parlours going blind pushing balls into machines."

_:He's right, Hikaru,:_ Sai affirmed. _:Do you think your parents or your Jii-chan would be happy if they found out you're getting money from illegal activities?:_

_:But, Sai, look how much we got! If we had stayed there for a few more hours, maybe we could have had over 100,000 yen!:_

_:Or lose everything we just earned. No, Hikaru. I refuse to be a party to gambling. It is a pastime for criminals.: _Hikaru stared at that set face and sighed, scuffing his toe on the street.

_:I know, Sai, but…:_

_:Hikaru, I promise you Kami-sama has better things in mind for you than gambling at these metal-ball places. Have patience.: _The ghost hugged the boy. _:Everything will be fine.:_

"So what do you want to do now? I did promise to treat you to arcade games." Kaga hooked his thumb and pointed at another storefront.

"Nah, I've had enough of those places for today, I think," the younger boy replied, disheartened. Sometimes he hated being so young. It made him feel so helpless. "I think I'm going over to Jii-chan's and ask him if he wants to play Go or not."

"You play Go?" Kaga exclaimed.

"Yeah. Why, do you?"

The older teen hesitated. "Once. I'm more into shougi now. Hey, so do you want to go to the recreation centre and see if we can play a game?"

Sai began jumping, chanting happily. Hikaru felt the heaviness in his chest lift and he smiled faintly. "If you're ready to be defeated, any time!"

"Hah! I might be the king of Shougi now, squirt, but there's no way a squirt like you is ready to beat GrandMaster Kaga!"

"Biii-da!" Hikaru pulled down an eyelid and stuck his nose at the older boy. "GrandMaster of what? Nose-picking?!"

"Why you!"

The two raced towards the recreation centre, teasing each other all the way.

WWWW

"A half-moku," Kaga whispered, staring at the evidence of his defeat.

Hikaru slumped back in his seat, letting out a deep sigh of relief. Kaga had been a tough opponent, fierce and wily, but he had played dozens of games with Sai. Maybe thousands if he could believe what Sai said about the two of them playing games in some kind of secret paradise. Still, he couldn't believe the thrill and exhilaration that seemed to shiver down his bones.

The game was a real eye-opener. Unlike Sai, Kaga was much weaker. This gave Hikaru an opportunity to see how much he had improved over the three months he had been learning to play, as well as see the mistakes other players made. Although Hikaru played with his grandfather, he was always forced to act as if he was a rank-beginner in order not to let his Jii-chan suspect something was wrong. As a result, the games were mainly unsatisfactory and he preferred to do other activities with his grandfather than Go.

Games with Sai, however, tested him to the very limits. Unfortunately, there was never a chance for Hikaru to win. Hikaru didn't think he could win even if he had 20 or more stone as handicap. Not that Sai would ever let him win, anyway; the ghost called slaughtering him 'shidougo'.

Kaga-san was strong, a true challenge, but it was the first challenge Hikaru had ever had where in he had a good chance of winning. Hikaru, who approached Go games with a mixture of more dread than excitement, found himself becoming more engrossed in the game. Glowing embers within him began to fan into full flame as he noticed more and more mistakes and took ruthless advantage of them. For the first time in an even game, Hikaru was able to make it all the way to seichi. He won by only a half-moku. It was his first ever win, and it was a win that had taken everything he had. Hikaru couldn't stop himself from grinning.

"I told you I was strong, Kaga!" he boasted. _:I won, Sai! I won!:_

Sai bopped him on the head with his fan, warning him not to be overconfident.

"Shindou, how old did you say you were?" Kaga asked abruptly, spearing him with an intense, dark gaze.

"Ten. I'm in fifth-grade. Why?"

"Have you ever considered becoming an insei?"

"An insei?" Both he and Sai echoed blankly.

Kaga frowned. "How can you play this well and not know what an insei is? Come to think of it, did you know you play in a very old-fashioned style?" The older boy studied the board. "Hmmm, I'd bet a you that your teacher is a Shusaku fan. A big one!"

"Eh-what? Shu-who?"

His new friend sighed and smacked himself in the forehead. "Right, let's start from the beginning. Shusaku is Honinbou-Shusaku, one of the greatest Go masters in Japan. He lived around the Edo period. The way you play uses a lot of Shusaku's favourite jouseki and tesuji."

_:That's because /I/ was Honinbou-Shusaku,:_ Sai claimed proudly, a bright smile on his face. Hikaru gave him an incredulous stare.

_:You said you came from the Heian era!:_

_:I do but remember I told you about Torajirou? When I was with Torajirou, he often let me play Go games through him and together we were able to attain the name and rank of Honinbou-Shusaku.:_

_:Huh.:_

"Anyway, Go's change a lot since then. For one thing, there's komi, which is a handicap on black," continued Kaga. "Basically, here in Japan, when people play even games, white gets a handicap of five-and-a-half. This means that black must get six moku more than white in order to win."

"That's unfair," Hikaru exclaimed, frowning. "Doesn't that put a lot of pressure on black?"

"Komi was created to make it more fair," the older boy countered. "The ability to play first is a powerful advantage when you're playing with someone of equal skill so being black gives any player a lead. That's why beginners always play black while their teachers play white."

_:I told you that, Hikaru, remember?:_

_:Hush, Sai, I'm listening!:_

"So, anyway, having komi puts white on a more even ground with black but because of komi, a lot of the old jouseki don't work well anymore. Take a look at this." Kaga pointed at a pattern on the upper right. "This is Shusaku's kosumi, one of his favourite moves. Without komi, this hand is very strong. However, with komi, it doesn't gain you as much territory so people have stopped using it." He stroked his chin, tapping the board with his own fan which arrogantly boasted the kanji for "king". "It's odd that a modern player uses such an old style."

Hikaru rubbed his hair, laughing nervously. "Oh, my teacher's very old-fashioned! So, what's an insei?"

"Insei are for the really serious Go students. They can be really little kids, about six or so, and they go to the Nihon Ki-in about twice a week after school to play and learn Go from professionals there. You have to take a test to go in and your parents have to pay a fee to keep you there, but it's the best chance you have to become a professional player," Kaga concluded. His face darkened. "Of course, places like that you end up with some really arrogant kids who think they're too good for you," he spat out.

"You were an insei, Kaga?"

"Nah. My dad forced me to go to lessons when I was younger, about five or so. Did it for a few years but I got tired of it." The older boy stretched. "I like shougi better anyway. But, Shindou, you should looked into taking insei classes."

Hikaru frowned down at the board and slowly started clearing it off. "I can't," he replied reluctantly. "I'm in trouble with school and I'm really behind in my class. My parents also won't pay for me to take Go lessons. They'll all just think it's stupid and buy me a book or something instead." _:Jii-chan's the only one who'll be willing to pay,:_ he said to Sai mentally, _:but Jii-chan already gives me too many things.:_

The spirit sighed. _:That is true. Oh well,:_ Sai grinned happily, _:this means you can just play me!:_

"What's the big deal about being a Go pro, anyway?" he asked Kaga as they walked out of the recreation centre.

"It's the goal of every strong Go player, idiot! But, okay, what it means is that you don't have to finish school or get a job once you become a Go pro. The Nihon Ki-in pays you to play Go, or go to conventions to do demonstrations, or to teach and publish. Being a Go pro is as serious a career as anything, and it's also quite well-respected," Kaga explained, clasping the back of his head. "People call pros 'sensei', they pay you to teach them to play or to hold exhibitions, and if you're a title-holder, you get old folks' asking for your autographs. You can also win a lot of money in the tournaments."

"Really?" Hikaru asked, wrinkling his nose. He had never thought anybody would ever want to hold a tournament for money for an old-fashioned, dull game like Igo before.

"Yeah. A major tournament can have a prize money of several million yen and title tournaments have more than that. Corporate sponsorship and all that, you know."

The fifth-grader goggled. "You can get a million yen playing Go?" he repeated in a strangled voice.

"Yep, or more. Of course, most Go pros never become title-holders. But still, being a Go pro is a relaxing way to make a living. Beats having to work eighteen hours at some dead-end company, trying to climb the ladder by being the boss' pet," the older boy stated.

Hikaru stopped walking. He swallowed and looked down at his feet. "Can, can someone with a health condition become pro?" he asked nervously.

"You mean like a heart problem or a wheelchair or something like that? I don't see why not," Kaga said, rubbing his nose. "Go players are always just sitting in front of gobans anyway. Plus, a lot of the title-holders are old men, which means they're more likely to have a stroke or something."

Kaga paused thoughtfully, thwacking his fan on the palm of his other hand. "One thing about Go is that the most important thing is ability," he stated softly, "if you can show people that you are strong in your game, I don't think the Nihon Ki-in really cares about anything else. It's the only profession I know where junior high kids can become pro and compete with seventy-year-old men. In Go, all that matters is strength."

"In Go, strength is everything, huh?" Hikaru repeated thoughtfully. He looked Kaga straight in the eye. "Ne, Kaga, do you think I can be a pro?"

"Hmmm, you definitely could. You're strong, squirt, very strong for someone your age. But the pro exams is long and hard, filled with a lot of strong, desperate players and the Nihon Ki-in only accepts three pros per exam. I'd recommend you join the insei class for at least a few months before trying to tackle the pro exam. Besides, you said you're behind in class, right? Go to salons and play with people there," Kaga suggested. "Go requires a lot of experience. You may be strong, but someone who has played Go ten years or more has a good advantage over you and many people who try to go to the pro exams have been playing Go for most of their lives."

They reached a bus station off the side of Akenoyama's main street. "So I'm taking the bus here," the older teen said, "what do you want to do?"

"My Jii-chan's house is just a few blocks away from here. I'll walk. Hey, Kaga, do you want to hang around again sometime?"

The older boy grinned and took out a piece of paper from his bag. He scribbled on it before handing it to Hikaru. "Call me if you want to do something! Next time we play, though, we'll play shougi!"

"Alright!" Hikaru yelled out. He turned and walked towards his grandfather's house.

_:Hikaru, what are you going to do?:_

The boy shrugged. _:I can't do anything about it right now, Sai,: _he replied. _:I got to get Akari to help me with my homework so I can move on to sixth-grade. We only have about two months left._

_:But,:_ the ten-year-old's eyes narrowed. _:I'm going to become a Go pro, Sai. I will prove to my dad that I'm not a burden.:_

WWWW

_So what did you think? I'm a little nervous about posting this chapter because it's so definitive a plot point and the end is still a little murky. Here's to hoping that it'll all work out! _

_And please, let me know what you think._


	8. Chapter 8

_**Title: DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION  
Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities  
Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life.**_

_Hah, this chapter is posted quickly (for me) in part to thank those who took the time to review, especially the ones who pointed out what they liked about the fic! It was really fantastic to read your comments and very encouraging as well. So I hope that this chapter will be good for you as well._

_One thing perhaps I need to explain: There were about three to four chapters that were already written out before I broke my arm and had to stop. Then, after I healed, not only did I not write for a long period of time, but my computer crashed so many times that I thought I lost those chapters. Thus, there is most likely this sense of disjointedness in the chapters and in the story itself because my approach now is different from then. I still hope that you may continue to like the fic as it progresses---you'll probably see more weird tangents in the future too. And yeah, there are several plotholes---thank you for pointing them out. I'll try and fix them when I can._

_Caveat: I did look up Japanese elementary school, but not all the details here are completely factual since I didn't attend one. _

_WWW_

**VI. **

Home Economics was one of Fujisaki Akari's favourite subjects because she had a lot of fun learning to cook and bake, sew and embroider, and even help at the small vegetable garden assigned to their class.

Today was a sewing day, but Akari was finding it very difficult to concentrate on her sewing project. Instead, her eyes kept moving away from the embroidery frame to watch the boy seated next to her.

Hikaru was acting strangely. Actually, he had been acting strangely ever since he got out of the hospital after he became ill suddenly. Akari couldn't understand it; Hikaru had been sick before, like the times when the two of them had measles and chicken pox. What so different now?

First, he quit the soccer team. Akari knew Hikaru loved soccer and playing, yet he quit the game for no good reason and decided to sign up for swimming lessons at the local recreation center. On top of that, she was walking past one of the studios at the recreation facility towards her ballet class on a late Saturday afternoon and saw Hikaru struggling in an adult's beginner yoga class! Hikaru and yoga?!

Akari had tried to ask Hikaru about it, but he just brushed her off. The more she insisted, the more he got angry until he finally shouted that she was the 'most stupid, annoying girl he ever knew' and that he hated how nosy she was. Stung and hurt, she fled to the washroom and cried. Their other friends had then ganged up on Hikaru, telling him how terrible he was but he had just ignored them and kept quiet for the rest of the day.

Hikaru's mother was also of no help. When she tried to ask during one of her visits, Oba-san had just smiled and hugged her, asking her to keep an eye on Hikaru and to take care of her. Akari had replied frankly that she always took care of Hikaru anyway, and Oba-san chuckled softly before leaving. Akari gave up asking.

However, that didn't mean she forgot all about it. Instead, more and more she watched Hikaru carefully, trying to figure out what was going on all by herself. She could do it too! After all, she was the second-best student in the class!

Right now, Hikaru was quietly struggling with his embroidery frame. Like all the other boys, he had chosen one of the animal patterns, while the girls went with flowers. While Akari's lily was blooming steadily underneath her hands, Hikaru's tiger seemed to be writhing in pain.

The boy looked up from his frame and saw Akari staring at him. Hikaru scowled ferociously. "Leave me alone, Akari! I don't need your help!"

"But, Hikaru, look you're---"

"I said leave me alone!" He yelled. The class quietened and everyone stared at them. Minami-sensei walked towards them. "Is there a problem, Akari-chan, Hikaru-chan?"

"No, Sensei, I was just helping Hikaru with his tiger," Akari replied. Hikaru ignored the two of them and looked down at his frame. Minami-sensei looked back and forth between them before finally saying, "Please keep it down. And Akari-chan, there are other people who may be wanting more help than Hikaru-chan."

"Hai, Sensei," Akari mumbled, looking down and flushing. She sent a nasty glare at her friend, but the boy never looked up.

That was one of the things that had changed in Hikaru. Before her friend was more cheerful and energetic, though he was also very impatient and proud. He tolerated the classes, but he was more eager to go out and play than study. He also never had a problem with her trying to help him in their classes before, especially for Home Economics. In fact, Hikaru more often than not tried to get her to finish his projects for him, but she was the one who refused. Now it was the other way around.

Akari gnawed at her lower lip and decided to concentrate on her project right now. It wasn't any of her concern if Hikaru handed in a mutated tiger.

As she continued to sew, she recalled an incident three weeks ago.

_["Oi, there's a fifth-grader fighting with Hirose-sempai behind the school!" _

"_Are you serious? Hirose-sempai from the baseball club?!"_

"_I'm serious! I heard it's the kid with the weird hair! Do you want to go see?"_

"_Of course!"_

_The bamboo broom clattered loudly onto the class floor. Akari found herself shaking as she realized that they must have been talking about Hikaru. She ran from the classroom, ignoring her classmates who yelled at her. _

_She skidded to a halt at the edge of a small group of students gathered at the backyard of the school. Akari pushed her way through, a loud pounding in her ears competing with the shouting and cheering. When she made it to the front, she stood still, staring at Hikaru._

_Her friend had a blackened eye and a bleeding lip which he wiped with his sleeve. His opponent was big for a sixth-grader, bulky at the shoulders with an evil expression on his ugly face. There was bruising in his right cheek. Right now, the two of them circled each other warily. _

"_Who do you think you are, a hero?" the older boy sneered at Hikaru. "We don't need stupid heroes like you at this school."_

"_Heh, come and get me then or are you afraid a fifth-grader's going to blacken your eye?" Hikaru taunted. _

"_Hah, I'm the one who's going to blacken your other eye!" The older boy rushed in with a punch, but Hikaru ducked to the left. He brought up his own fist and it made a loud smacking sound as it hit the other boy's left eye. Hirose shouted in pain and tried to launch himself at Hikaru again, but the younger boy hooked his foot around one of the other's ankles and tripped him. Hirose landed with a thud on the dusty ground. _

"_WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!" Students scattered as the P.E. teacher marched towards them. He stopped near Akari and glared down at Hikaru and Hirose. "WELL?!"_

"_This little kid tried to break my nose!" The sixth-grader shouted. "You should expel him!"_

"_Oh really? And Shindou-kun just tried to break your nose without reason, Misato-kun? That's not what I heard from Kobayashi-kun. Misato-kun, you've been warned twice already about your bullying. The two of you will come with me right now to the nurse's office and then we'll deal with your punishments." Akari followed after them, totally bewildered about what was going on._

"_Ne, Hikaru, why did you fight with Hirose-sempai?" she asked him as they walked home from school. Hikaru had been warned against fighting and his mother had been called, but he was free from other punishments. The sixth-grader, however, was given a week-long suspension and was pulled from the baseball club. _

"_He's just a stupid bully," Hikaru replied dismissively. The nurse had fussed over him particularly, warning Hikaru about 'aggravating his condition' and 'not overexerting himself'. Akari had listened to the admonishments and she knew that her worries about Hikaru were correct. _

"_Hikaru, what did the nurse mean when she mentioned 'your condition'?"_

"_It's nothing, Akari."_

"_Hikaru, why aren't you telling me?! I'm your friend, aren't I?! I'm not going to tell anyone!"_

"_I said it's nothing, Akari! Now come on, I don't want Kaa-san to be even madder at me if I come in late!" With that, Hikaru ran off, leaving a very frustrated Akari to follow._

Akari had been forced to ask their classmates about what happened. It seemed Hikaru had come upon the sixth-grader beating up on the fourth-grader and had jumped in suddenly. The fourth-grader had run (smartly, she thought) for a teacher, while Hikaru continued to face off against the bully. Hikaru never mentioned the incident, though Akari heard rumours that her friend had told off a few of the lesser bullies but there were no more fights.

And then there was last week when Hikaru's mother called her house. She said that Hikaru was sick and that he won't be going to school for a week and asked if Akari wouldn't mind picking up Hikaru's homework. Akari had agreed; however, every time she attempted to visit him, Hikaru would always yell at her to go away. What was even stranger was that Hikaru was back at school three days later and he looked perfectly fine. She had wondered if he was faking, but she didn't think Mitsuko-obasan would let Hikaru get away with not going to class after he'd missed so much already without good reason.

She yelped as she accidentally stabbed her thumb. She stuck the digit into her mouth and sucked away the blood. Hikaru was so annoying! He was always changing before her! First, he gets all mad because she asks him if something's wrong and then, he starts acting friendly and asking her about jobs and grades of all things! Hikaru never cared before!

Akari knew there was something going on here. It was like those novels she read: her journalistic instinct was telling her that there was a big story with Hikaru and a good journalist never allowed a lead to go unexplored.

WWWW

_This is more vignette-ish, a lot more in line with the first chapters than the one before it. Re-reading was kind of interesting as I rarely write from a girl's pov nowadays. I hope it worked out._


	9. Chapter 9

_**Title: DIFFERENT ROADS, SAME DESTINATION  
Author: Lady Addiction  
Fandom: Hikaru no Go  
Pairings: None  
Warnings: GEN, AU, angst, people with disabilities  
Dedication: In thanks to the Lord for his many mercies in my own life.**_

_My apologies for taking so long. As my real life has started picking up, my fandom existence has been receding. I apologize especially for my faithful reviewers for not replying. I hope that this new chapter will be of consolation. Your feedback has been extremely encouraging and fun for me to read, and I thank you!_

WWWW

**IX.**

Kuwabara Shinnosuke sighed as he wandered around the Go convention. It seemed for the quadruple-title-holder that his life was all about conventions, interviews, and matches, and the people he met were all the same. It was boring.

The Akenoyama Annual Go Festival was one of the smallest Kuwabara had ever been to, and mainly made up of middle-aged or elderly men who were eager to meet the Honinbou and watch his demonstration. It was held at the district's main banquet hall, which had been decorated with colorful banners, sales and exhibition booths, and tables for people to play shidougo with the professional players that were hired to manage the event.

Kuwabara had every right to decline the invitation but since his wife was right now adamantly reorganizing their house for an upcoming family reunion, the elderly man had decided to make a surprise visit.

He never got tired of the gratifying double takes as people recognized him or of how the event organizers were immediately panicked when he showed up at the door. He finally had to assure them that there was no need to change the schedule, as he wanted to simply look around. Kuwabara had hidden a feral smile, as the faces of some of the organizers grew paler. He couldn't help but notice how one or two vendors had quickly fussed with their merchandise, somehow miraculously transforming signs or prices.

_It was such a pity what the Nihon Ki-in has been reduced to,_ he thought to himself, eyeballing one of the suspicious merchandise. It looked to be one of those kaya-imitation gobans. The chubby salesman smiled and wiped his forehead madly, greeting the Honinbou politely. Kuwabara spent a pleasant half-hour terrorizing the salesman to the point where he would think it was a good idea to close shop immediately, before moving on with a smug smile.

Suddenly, he came upon a long table with several laptop computers running. The booth assistant, a young, pleasant-faced man that Kuwabara knew vaguely, was helping a child at one of the computers. Kuwabara drew closer and saw that they were playing Net-Go.

At seventy-five-years-old, Kuwabara was the oldest active pro in Japan. He had strived to build a reputation as being tricky and unpredictable, so naturally when he started hearing about Net-Go, he made an effort to learn how to play in order to shock his students and colleagues. It was not his preferred method of play since he lacked substantial challengers, except for one player who was rapidly gaining notoriety.

The booth assistant stood up, telling the boy that he can now start playing, before looking at where Kuwabara was standing. The assistant's mouth dropped open, but the elderly pro brought a finger to his lips. The young man nodded nervously and moved aside.

Kuwabara watched the boy play, at first idly, then with a sharp intensity. He soon realized the child playing was no ordinary player. Instead, he defeated his first opponent within ten minutes, an opponent ranked at 10k. His second opponent was a 3k and was also quickly dispatched.

It wasn't until the boy's opponent was a 4d that the game started to stretch for longer. Kuwabara followed the play, amazed and thoughtful at the clever and unpredictable plays the boy made. He had easily recognized a very strong influence of Shusaku evident in the boy's games; actually, the boy played like a true student of that legendary Honinbou if not for his modern jouseki and tesuji.

When the boy won the game by another resignation, this time at yosei, Kuwabara stepped forward and tapped him on the shoulder. The child yelped and swiveled his chair around. The elderly man narrowed his eyes at the unconventional hair and the clear green eyes of the undoubtedly Japanese boy. "You, boy, what's your name?" Kuwabara asked abruptly.

"Shindou Hikaru," the boy replied with an annoyed expression. "You shouldn't startle people like that, Jii-san. I could have had a heart attack."

Kuwabara let out a crowing laughter. "Little boy, I'm more likely to have a heart attack than you. So, Shindou Hikaru, are you an insei?"

The boy shook his head, causing Kuwabara to mentally rub his hands in glee. Ideas were bubbling inside of him; he always loved upsetting the system. "Why not? You seem to be a good player," he said casually. "Even an old man like me can see that."

"I was thinking about it but I missed the insei exams and I was told the next one would be in another few months." The boy's expression showed clear annoyance at this.

"Oh? Are you wanting to become a professional player?" _Such strength would be wasted if you were not,_ Kuwabara added mentally.

"Yeah. I was actually thinking of signing up for the pro exams but the person at Nihon Ki-in told me I should go to Insei classes first," Shindou said, turning back to the computer. "I'm not going to bother. It's stupid. I'd rather take the pro exams right away, except I missed the application deadline." His hand movements were jerky as he communicated his anger through the mouse.

"Hmmm, and why do you want to become a pro so early?" Kuwabara asked, quite curious about this unusual boy. He had met a number of Go hopefuls but none who intrigued him so much as this young boy. There was a strange intensity in the air around Shindou Hikaru, which made Kuwabara feel more wary.

"I want to earn money," the boy replied frankly. "I don't want to wait until after high school or university before I can get a job. I want one now."

Kuwabara frowned at this thoughtfully. In his experience, a child of ten, maybe eleven, was more interested in friends, playing games, and popular culture than in finding jobs. Yet, this sapling was clearly serious and sincere about his desire. He decided to prod at why.

"That's none of your business, Jii-san," came the snapped reply. "Look, can you go away? I want to play another game."

"Why not play at a salon? Surely they have stronger players there than over the Internet."

"You're so nosy, Jii-san! Salons cost money, that's why!" He agreed to another challenger, this one another 4d.

Kuwabara watched in silence as the boy played, admiring the obvious skill and good judgment displayed. The boy must be dedicated, he concluded, for his game shows the experience of hundreds of matches. Definitely pro material. He pondered the enigma before him.

"Boy," he said when the game concluded and Shindou had won with 4-moku, "I am actually a fairly-good player myself and I'm always looking for somebody to play with. Do you have time over the weekend to play me here?" The booth assistant choked at this.

Shindou turned back to face him, eyes narrowed in a suspicious gaze. "You're not one of those disgusting old men, are you?!" he asked bluntly. "I'll scream really loud if you try anything!"

Kuwabara crowed with laughter, ignoring the indignant gasp of shock by the assistant. Actually, the assistant had been getting redder and redder as he and the boy talked but he signaled the other man to leave them alone. "You have my word that I will not harm you, young Shindou," he replied, still chuckling. "How about this then? I will pay 1500 yen for three hours of your time a week and I promise it will all be about Go. You are looking for a job, right?"

The boy's face became thoughtful. "It's only for Go, right? What's the catch?"

"Oh, that you will do whatever I say for those three hours," Kuwabara smiled cannily at him, "or are you too scared of a little old man like me?"

"I don't know," Shindou scowled and crossed his arms, "that still sounds very suspicious to me. Are you sure you're not one of those---"

At this, the booth assistant seemed unable to withstand the boy's continuing disrespect towards one of the icons of the Go world. He cleared his throat and stepped forward, looking disapprovingly at Shindou. "If you will pardon me," he interrupted, "I will vouch for Kuwabara-san, Shindou-kun. You have my word that Kuwabara-san has no such intentions upon you."

The boy looked disconcerted, and he cocked his head to the side, his eyes becoming distant. When he straightened up again, his expression was friendlier. "If you say so, Ashiwara-san." He looked at Kuwabara and nodded. "You have a deal, Kuwabara-san. 1500 yen for three hours. I'm usually free on Sundays." They exchanged contact information and Kuwabara walked off, a wide smile still on his face.

Suddenly, Ashiwara the booth assistant came up to his elbows. They stopped a goodly distance from the Net-Go booth, where Shindou had restarted playing. Kuwabara looked at the other man thoughtfully. "Ashiwara, Ashiwara…ah, I remember!" He stroked his chin. "You are one of Touya-Meijin's students."

The younger pro bowed. "Ashiwara Hiroyuki, it's a pleasure to meet you, Kuwabara-sensei," he greeted politely.

"So, Ashiwara-kun, what can I do for you?"

"Ano, about Shindou-kun…"

"Ah, he is an interesting child, isn't he?"

The other pro looked sheepish. "I wouldn't have noticed if it weren't for your attention, Sensei. But may I ask why you are showing such an interest in him?"

"Oh, I'm an old man and an old man needs something diverting every once in a while." Kuwabara crowed in laughter again. "Shindou-kun, I think, would prove to be very diverting."

He walked off, leaving the younger man astonished and thoughtful.

WWWWW

_Kuwabara is one of those characters who stood out as much from the manga as he did from the fics for me, but that was possibly because of how they inserted him canon-wise. But I do like him and writing him has made me like him more. I hope that I was able to do his character justice and that this chapter still fits with the fic. I'll have much to do to revise this fic, I think, once it's complete. But I hope you continue to enjoy it!_


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